Day 68 - Yankees Day #2

June 7th – Today marks the first day of my true Yankee fan-ship. But, first and foremost, today is my girlfriend’s birthday. She will be, well, she will be. She may be reading this later and so I won’t get into detail about how old she is. She is truly me best friend. However, she is more than just that. Simply put, she is my everything. The words of a card or poem or song can never really do her justice. I mean, it would take a Hallmark card the length of a novel to put to words how I feel. She’s my soul mate and I love her dearly! Happy Birthday Elbie…

Los Jankees - I’m not sure if I’m excited or not. It’s kind of like the first day at a new school. It’s not like a 10 year old showing up to the first day of school ready to rule the 5th grade. I’m not going to be able to see all of the same friends and just walk around the playground with a chip on my shoulder. No, this is different. It’s like the first day of a new school, in a new city, with no friends. Well, I have a couple of friends that are darkside dwellers, and they could probably ease me in. I won’t feel like Danny LaRusso did, but I will still be a little nervous. I mean, I have no idea what to expect. Is it true that I can walk up to someone, anyone, ANYWHERE, with a Red sox hat on and basically shit on him? I don’t have to be at a game, or a bar watching the game? As a pending Dodger fan, I’ve taken part in getting in a Giants’ or Padres’ fan’s face. I’ve yelled at toddlers while atop their daddy’s shoulders for rocking the Angels garb(age) at our beloved stadium. But, I’ve been told that I could be in confession at church, spot a guy through the dark curtains with a Boston hat on and just verbally assault him. Sounds like I’m already warming up to the fact that the Bronx Bombers are it this week…
Today, we open a three game set against, well, the Dead Sox. Boston pansies with no class and a “once in every 100 years” world champ percentage. Big Sloppy, Kevin BOO-kalis and the rest of the boys come into town to start 10 games in 10 days at Yankee Stadium. Luckily for the Dead Sox fans, I only have 6 more days to go. So, you’ll only have to tuck those caps for a few more days losers. But, best believe, if I see a “B” on someone’s hat, they’re going to hear it. I don’t care if it’s for the Dead Sox, the Bruins (either), Baylor or Bolles HS. If it’s a “B”, you’re catching a tongue lashing.

Sidenotes/rants: Last night, I watched the most ridiculous thing to ever hit television. No, not when the dude blew his brain out on top of the 105 overpass. That was more entertaining. I remember when we used to go get 29 cent hamburgers on Wednesday from McDonalds (twenty of them which we would pay for in change) and go to Amelia and watch that shit over and over again. NO! It was not seeing some car crash or tornado or footage of some natural disaster. It wasn’t another police brutality video or a story about parents killing their babies. It was worse. I know you must be thinking what could be worse than some of those things I listed. Well, this is. I ranked this #1 on my craziest shit I’ve seen on TV. Beating out these two…
#3 – Mark Hominick’s head/face after his bout with Jose Aldo…

What can you say but “COT DAMN!”

#2 – Marisol’s mom on Real Housewives of Miami

This hag looks like a Monster. It’s like she has a permanent condition that eats her alive daily called “Botched-alism”. She’s a walking money back guarantee. (please don’t try and click to zoom)

#1…DRUMROLL…I’m talking “My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding”. These people are ridiculous. Not only are they living in trailers or “caravans” which they are about to lose (is it foreclosure or repossession), but they go out and have these over the top weddings that include 200 pound dresses with lights and electronic moving butterflies on them. You have to watch it to understand how ridiculous this really is. Some of the dresses look like they came straight out of Drai’s in Las Vegas on Halloween weekend.

Watch the show, you will feel better about yourself after. Similar to how you feel after watching “The Wonderful Whites of West Virginia”

I leave you on this note:

It’s one of those days…

Day 989834

So, I know it’s been a while, and for good reason. I mean, quite simply put, I have been bored with baseball. Plus, the sheer fact of cheering for the darkside was reason enough to find other things to do with my time. There was TPC in early May. Anyone could tell you that I absolutely love that course and love that tournament. There were a bunch of movies releasing that me and my girl saw (four in may alone). All in all, I just found other things to do than write this blog. But, I figured it was time to write again. I was inspired by my friend’s wife. She posted her blog update to Facebook about her SuperMom self. After reading it, I felt like I should write something today. So, here I am.

The “Mom”trepeneur - First of all, let me give praise to my friend’s wife. My friend “L” is “almost common law” married to “SM” (super mom). They have two kids. Two adorable kids at that. Anyhow, she often gives us updates about what she is working on for parties and activities. See, she makes custom piñatas for kids parties and they are the dopest piñatas I’ve ever seen (as far as kid’s piñatas go. I’ve seen some adult themed ones that were pretty effin fresh). Anyhow, this girl gets down. It seems like every day has an update about what she is doing for these kids and I admire her for that. I even read her blog about being a super mom. I have no kids, yet. But, I still find her blog to be informative and entertaining. If you get a chance, check out her page HERE. Pretty sweet piñatas.

TPC - In true Jacksonville fashion, the weather the week before the tournament was amazing. 70’s during the day and low 60’s at night with a cool breeze. Then, right before the tournament, it got hot as fuck. I mean, really hot. Last year I made it to all the practice days, which is the highlight of the tournament to me. Pictures and autographs all day long. This year was no different. I made it to all the practice days. I got a few highlight pieces signed. My 2011 Masters flag signed by winner Charl Schwartzel. I got my 2010 US open Pebble Beach flag signed by winner Graeme McDowell. I also got my 2010 PGA Championship flag signed by winner Martin Kaymer. Before he signed that, he signed a ball that he was using and handed it to me. So, for me, complete success. The only thing I didn’t get signed was my 2010 Masters flag. Oh Phil, how I hate you so… anyhow, I even got a tourney day in as I went to see Tiger play the 9th, and then he was done. He’s starting to act like a little spoiled child. Face it dude, you just ain’t as good as you were a few years ago. Maybe you are that good, but everyone is better now. I don’t know, but what I do know is you need to get your shit together and start playing golf and having fun. Sorry for the rant, but I had enough. I shifted my golf fan-ship to Kaymer for the fact that he gave me a ball. A simple gesture and all of a sudden he had the dude at the tournament with the best kicks on, and most gangsta attitude, in his corner.

Movies – I joined this movie pool and quickly became this year’s bonehead picking Priest to finish in the Top 10. It had so much going for it. Maggie Q and her recent mainstream success (Nikita). 3D film about vampires that was rated PG-13. They marketed that movie since Jackass #d (when I first saw the trailer). I thought it was a lock. Instead, it got beat out by Bridesmaids. Hell, I didn’t even go see it after the opening weekend reviews. But, I did manage to see four flicks. Fast 5 was surprisingly pretty darn good. A lot of action and a really good plot. I would recommend that movie to anyone really. Thor was good as well. It was better than I thought it would be. It kept me entertained and I would download it (for free) when the BluRay rip hit newsgroups. Hangover 2 was a fuckin blast. I am planning on seeing it again in theatres. I was rolling for two hours straight. Pirates 4 was the least favorite of these 4. Just another Pirates movie with cool costumes and scenery. I’m not a Penelope Cruz fan so her voice got annoying really quick. There are a few more movies I want to see this summer and will update you with how I think they are.

Anyway, as you can see I just delayed the blog again. I totally got sidetracked. However, this week, starting tomorrow, I will be a full-fledged Yankee fan. I’m not sure if they want me or not, but I don’t care what they want. Let me work on being a rude New Yawker. This ought to be interesting. Hopefully, I have readers left. I know I was up to about 6 people following the blog but kind of let em all hanging. Stay tuned folks. There is much more profanity to come.

EDIT: I forgot to tell you about my trip to the Farmer’s Market. It wasn’t like the ones in L.A. Those tend to focus more on the entertainment and prepared foods than it does the local produce, but this one here was different. It was all about local ingredients and it was for sure that peaches were in season. You could smell the fresh peaches throughout the whole market. I picked up chiles and peppers to make chili verde and boy it came out great. Tomatillos and green chiles highlighted my buy. My girl picked up some sweet mangoes and I had one for the first time and it was AMAZING. I want to try and go once a week to pick up fresh ingredients to make something on Sunday nights. Anyhow, this is what I created, at midnight…


I leave you on this note as I pay homage to Sunday nights with Huggy Boy…
“This is dedicated to my man Flaco. I can’t wait to see you when you get home (from jail). I miss you baby and can’t wait to have your baby (even though I’m 15 and you’re 30).” At least that’s how I heard the dedications…